Sherie Griffiths

The first show with Steve Dickinson of Dickinson coaching went so well, I asked him back last week, to look at another answer to the question, ‘So what’s stopping you?‘. this time, we talked about ’limiting beliefs’ – things like:
hopelessness – ’what’s the point of trying – it won’t work!’;
helplessness – ’I can’t do it! Other people can, but I can’t’; and
worthlessness – ’I don’t deserve to succeed.’

Now, you may never have entertained such thoughts. If not, you’re very lucky. I haven’t met many people in business who haven’t fallen prey to at least one of the destructive little b******s at some point – and I’m quite prepared to admit that I’ve met them all in my time! So I found it genuinely inspiring to have them unmasked in front of me as the imposters they are.

These thoughts, which look and feel so real when they invade our heads, are really nothing but distorting mirrors, or shadows on the wall.

It’s my eldest brother’s birthday today – the old boy is sixty (I should add that he’s A LOT OLDER THAN ME!). Happy birthday Kev! As a kid, he had a vivid imagination and was once quite seriously spooked by what he thought was a strange man on the landing outside his bedroom door – until Dad threw on the light and showed him the ’strange man’ was just the shadow cast by Dad’s coat and hat hanging at the top of the stairs.

As Steve talked about hopelessness, helplessness and worthlessness last Thursday, it occurred to me – they’re just illusions; shadows cast by whatever we happen to have left hanging around in our own minds. Rather than being entrenched and getting in the way of what we want to do, they’re very easily dispelled, by someone flicking the light switch to show us that the shadows have no substance – and a little tidying up – in this case, simply rewording the thought: ‘
What if it did work?’, rather than, ’What’s the point – it won’t’;
’Can I?’, rather than, ’I can’t’; and
’If I want to do this, I’m entitled to give it a go’, instead of, ’I don’t deserve the chance’.

‘Just good, old-fashioned common sense?‘ Well, yes. I’ve known it all, and done my best to practice it, for years – but I’ve never heard it expressed quite so simply and practically.

This week, Steve is looking at ‘The fear of rejection and the belief that “no” is necessarily negative’. If you’re in the Basildon & East Thurrock area, you can listen on 97.8 FM. If not, you can catch the programme by clicking on gateway978.com at 3pm tomorrow.

We promise not to feel rejected if you don’t!